Once again, I'm thrilled to invite another guest poster to Broadway Abridged, this time it's legendary West End producer Michael Codron!

I may or may not actually be Michael Condron Updated by Probably Not Michael Condron Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Hi folks,

In a recent Guardian article, I was quoted as having a "flash of anger" towards bloggers who review shows before their opening night. I said:

"It's almost invariably reactionary responses. They're the modern equivalent of the lot that used to boo the plays in the 50s and 60s. I think they're ghastly."

This has annoyed more than a few bloggers, so I thought I'd elaborate, with a focus on Broadway because who knows what those London Looneys are doing.
Now in the great olden days, Broadway previews...

• Were rusty.
• Couldn't be seen by critics, not till opening night. Literally.
  
• Were sold for cheaper because, again, they were rusty.
• Actually they weren't *that* rusty, because of this ancient artifact called "Out of Town Tryouts".
  

Of course, we've made some changes:

• They're still pretty rusty.
• Hell, they're even rustier. Half of us have done away with out-of-town tryouts. It's a budgeting issue, but I like to blame this one on the bloggers "out of town reviewing habits" too.
• We dutifully ignore the Wicked producers who swear it wouldn't be running without them having done out-of-towns.
• Critics still can't see them until literally opening ni--
  Well, until about a week before opening night.
• They are now just as expensive as the regular, non-rusty performances.
• Telecharge and theater box offices make it pretty hard to even differentiate which ones are preview.
  
• Telecharge even list the upcoming previews as "upcoming performances".
• The chances that a show skips out of town, starts previews horribly, and end up Pulitzer and Tony award winning aren't that good.
  
• But I still like to whine and bitch.
  

So do I expect the not-getting-free-tickets blogger to not talk about preview performances at all, even if they paid full price of their own hard-earned money from?

Yes.

Does that make me an old fuddy duddy jackass?

Oh. Yes. It fucking does.

                       ALL ABOUT ME ABRIDGED
                                OR
           SHE FLEW ALL THE WAY FROM AUSTRALIA FOR THIS?
            From the "Broadway Abridged Shorts" Archive
                                                  By Gil Varod
                             

	           A BEHANDING IN SPOKANE ABRIDGED
                                OR
                 "OH NO, WHAT DO WE DO NOW?" THE PLAY

              From the "Broadway Abridged" Shorts Archives
                                By Gil Varod and Gina Guadagnino
                              

For God's same, somebody give the man some Aspirin.

Today's Broadway Abridged Guest Script comes from TVGasm Writer The Unprofessional Critic, who was kind enough to go see 101 Dalmatians The Musical in Chicago which:

• really exists
• is really something that Disney didn't have any involvement with
• is really presented by Purina Dog Chow
• really stars Sara Gettelfinger
• really involves Jerry Zaks
• is really going to be at the Washington Mutual Theater Madison Square Garden Theater in April
• is something I have zero intention of seeing. Thanks Unpro!